Capitolo 21 :: 21

Pubblicato: 13-05-06 - Ultimo aggiornamento: 13-05-06

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Kaori sighed heavily, doodling in her old notebook. She always used this notebook, when she needed some reprieve from her thoughts, from her life. It helped a lot. It had a cathartic effect, drawing her dreams in there.  

And she needed that reprieve tonight. She didn’t want to think about the decision she made, she didn’t want to think about him… She didn’t want to think about anything…  

There was a weird weight on her chest. She felt like she couldn’t breathe properly.  

She quickly shook her head to get rid of those thoughts. There was nothing wrong with her breathing. There was nothing wrong with her. Well, maybe there was something wrong with her nerves.  

The butterfly feeling hit her stomach again. She was definitely nervous. The week was almost over. Actually, the week was ending tonight. If Ryo didn’t find any clue on Silver Fox’ whereabouts, she was dying tomorrow.  

The pencil landed on the page as she leaned her head against the window and let her eyes wander over Shinjuku skyscrapers, strangely illuminated by the neon lights.  

Death. It was quite a lovely word for something so terminal. She wasn’t yet ready to die, was she?  

Her head lifted off the windowpane as she stared wide-eyed at the wall.  

Was she?!  

She didn’t feel sad to be leaving this world. She didn’t feel afraid, she was just a bit nervous. And she was angry. Angry just as the last time the bastard has threatened her. And just like the last time, she wasn’t angry at Silver Fox. Oh, no. She was angry at Ryo.  

She was pissed, actually. Pissed as hell.  

Last time she was mad, because he told her she was incompetent, so she wanted to prove something to him… little good it did to her. He sent her away no matter what.  

This time, she was mad, because, yes, he was trying to find Silver Fox and save her life, but still, he didn’t have to be gone all day, avoid her like the plague… not talk to her. They have barely spoken since that night when he openly lied to her face and she pretended to buy the bull.  

Her jaw set as she heard the front door softly close. He was home. And since it was her last night on this Earth, she was definitely going to get her talk. He was going to explain. And he was going to explain correctly. No more lies, no more half-truths… Nope! Tonight, Saeba Ryo was going to sing like a canary. And he’s going to sing on key! She was going to make sure of that!  

As the door to the living room slowly opened, Kaori slammed the notebook closed and jumped off the windowsill, arms akimbo.  

»Welcome home! I’m…«  

Reika cocked her head as she watched the redhead snap her mouth closed.  

»Sorry to disappoint, but I’m afraid you’ll have to wait some more before Ryo makes his appearance. I just called him. He’s on his way.«  

»Oh…« Kaori shrugged. »I better leave then, so you can talk in private,« she squeezed between clenched teeth.  

»It’s about you, actually, so you better stick around, it’s quite a story.« Reika sighed heavily. »But I came here early, because I needed a word with you. Just the two of us.«  

Kaori looked at her suspiciously. »What about?«  

»Whatever fairytale Ryo told you about us.«  

»Oh, you mean that one about you two being lovers?«  

Reika gasped. Right to the point, was she? »Yes…«  

Kaori smiled slightly. »There really is no need to explain. Trust me on that one.«  

»I know there isn’t, but still, I can’t pretend… I’m not Ryo.«  

Kaori moved to the sofa. »Meaning?« She slowly sat, folding her legs under her.  

»Meaning, I just can’t go around telling lies to people and not feel bad or hurt about it… There’s nothing between Ryo and me. No matter what he told you, it’s not true…«  

»I know.«  

»…He just invented this whole story, because he didn’t want to show he’s jealous of…« She stopped. »What?«  

»I know you two are not lovers, Reika.«  

Reika stared at her suspiciously. Was it possible Ryo told her the truth? »How do you know?«  

Kaori chuckled. »That dolt has one hell of a poker face, but I can see right through him. I couldn’t before. But I can now…« She stared at her knees, speaking with a soft voice: »I wonder why. What changed?«  

That soft note struck a cord inside of Reika. »Why do you even care what changed, anyway?!«  

Kaori’s head snapped up at the hostile tone. »Excuse me?«  

»You’re engaged to Mick Angel, remember? He’s the one you should know inside and out. Your fiancé, not Ryo, your ex-partner!«  

»Don’t worry, Reika. I’m not trying to steal him away from you.«  

»You couldn’t!«  

Kaori was taken aback. »Oh?«  

»He’s not mine. His heart belongs to you. But you already know that, don’t you.«  

»He’ll never admit it.«  

Reika sat on the armchair. »What if he does?«  

»He won’t. And I finally know why he’s so afraid of loving someone. And I understand perfectly… He’ll never admit to a weakness.« She shrugged. »It’s better this way, I guess.«  

Reika swallowed. What was the woman trying to say? »And if he would admit he loves you? If he would come through that door, drop to his knees and vow eternal love and devotion to you?«  

Kaori arched an eyebrow, grinning. »That’s one hell of a mental picture you drew, there. Do you really think he’s the type of person to do something like that?«  

»No…« Reika nervously worried her lower lip between her teeth. »But what if it would happen? What would you do?«  

Kaori moved a wisp of hair behind her ear. »Are you asking me, if I would call off my engagement?«  

»Yes.« The voice shook slightly.  

Kaori smiled. »That’s none of your business.«  

Reika stared at her with her mouth hanging open. In this aspect, she guessed, some of Ryo’s in-your-face brazenness rubbed off onto his assistant. Kaori’s lips were curved into a gorgeous smile and her eyes twinkled mischievously.  

It was like looking at Ryo at his best.  

And indeed, it was. The woman didn’t answer the question. Like Ryo, she didn’t evade the question, actually, she fed her the words, but she didn’t answer it either. But Ryo would also try to divert the subject…  

»Would you like a cup of tea?«  

Reika sighed. She certainly didn’t have to wait long. »Yes, please.«  

»Milk, sugar?« Kaori was already on her feet, the smile never wavering.  

»Plain, thank you.«  

Kaori winked. She managed to change the subject and remove herself from the room all in one swift move. Ryo could be really proud of her. She was a good pupil.  

»Be back in a jiffy!« And she disappeared in the kitchen.  

»Oh, yeah. You can be proud, Ryo,« Reika mumbled. »You taught her well.«  

She sighed, gaining her feet. She couldn’t sit still, not even to mull over the strange talk she just had with Makimura Kaori. She needed Ryo to get home soon, she couldn’t stand to be here much longer. She might start asking questions that really were none of her business… And she might even start begging the woman to leave Ryo alone, not to torture him any longer… To leave him be.  

As she paced and waited for Ryo – and her cup of tea – a closed notebook on the windowsill caught her attention.  

What was it? A diary perhaps. A journal, where Kaori dotted her most private and intimate thoughts… Did she write about Ryo in there? Did she write about what she still felt for her ex-partner? Or did she write love poems about her fiancé? Reika seriously doubted that.  

Mick has disappeared the moment he left Kaori at Ryo’s doorstep, but with the exception of the first two days, or so Ryo has told her, Kaori hasn’t even tried to get in touch with him. She didn’t even talk about him… Not even before, when they were talking about the possibility of Ryo confessing his true feelings, she didn’t say Mick’s name. She referred to the whole thing as ‘her engagement’. It was a cold choice of words for a woman about to get married. For a woman with a…  

Reika paused. The ring. The diamond engagement ring. She hasn’t seen it on Kaori’s hand, not the right not the left one. Where did the woman put her engagement ring? What did it all mean?  

Picking up the notebook, she was more than ever adamant in learning Kaori’s innermost thoughts.  

And as she opened it, she learnt them big time. Except they weren’t in writing.  

Eyes wide, she slumped onto the windowsill, leafing through the notebook.  

»Oh, my God…« she whispered as a warm tear trickled down her cheek. 

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